show me one more step in the world

i'm gonna let you all know something about me... i don't really like to blog. maybe it's a character flaw. but here i am today, blogging. because i woke up with a prayer on my lips and a heart that's ready to share it.

this past stretch hasn't exactly been easy, but no matter what i am faced with here or what difficulty i go through, when i look back, i still wouldn't trade it for anything. despite all the odds that i feel going against me, i haven't once lost my desire to be here or my love for this country. i hope that you'll continue praying for the Dominican Republic, more specifically Monte Cristi, and even more specifically Las Flores, the little slice of this town that i call my barrio (neighborhood). pray for all of the special kids who are now spread out over this country who have literally changed my life forever.

pray for all these things, but that isn't the prayer i'm talking about. i'm writing today to ask you to pray over me. i spend most of my free time racking my brain about the future, wondering what my next step in life should be. my heart is so deeply rooted in this place, and i love what i am doing... but i am still searching for the more of the Lord. and i have no idea what that will look like. so right now i just ask you to pray over my seeking... pray for strength and wisdom... and pray for peace and wholeness in my life. things are a little off, but i have to believe that peace will come. and if you kept me in your prayers even after today, i would be so thankful.

in the meantime, i will be loving the kids that i am watching grow week in and week out. being a part of their lives is one of my favorite parts of living here.

:)

dry bones.

Sitting here in my bed browsing Pinterest, a cup of piping hot Jarabacoa coffee in hand, I'm starting my day from a broken place. I have neglected to blog, mostly because I have been going through a season of confusion and disappointment. The life that I have chosen is not easy, and the past few months have been a huge reminder of that. All that said, I am still alive and okay! We're still in the school loving on kids and living life with these people, and God is here, but man... this has been a rough patch. And some days all that gets me out of bed are the Lord's promises to me of redemption. He makes all things new and I still believe that. But personally and circumstantially... this is hard.

 "let me hear joy and gladness; let the bones that you have broken rejoice." psalm 51:8

My prayer has been that the Lord would somehow revive me like He brought the dry bones to life in Ezekiel. I feel chewed up and spit out; empty and broken. And I tell you this so that you can pray for me to somehow step into the more that God has for me... because there's got to be more. My heart beats for this place and what this place needs is a miracle. It needs the Holy Spirit speaking to hearts in ways that only He can. It needs things that I could never think up or imagine on my own.

I don't want to depress or cause anyone to worry. I only want, if you would, for people to pray for a breath of life to come this way.

"And you shall know that I am the Lord, when I open your graves, and raise you from your graves, O my people. And I will put my Spirit within you, and you shall live..."  Ezekiel 37:13-14

appreciate

just taking a moment today to appreciate things from these past few days and the coming weekend (before we start teaching on monday and get into a routine...)

i think today is for loving and appreciating and taking pictures and just being with people. today is for making coffee and making people smile.  i want to capture all the goodness i see. i am thankful for laughing with friends until i lose my breath. i'm thankful that now i can listen to josé play songs he wrote himself. i'm blessed when i work huge puzzles at my kitchen table with people i love and when we all clean the garage floor and spray down the front of the house together. i love juice and colmados and heart sprinkles and so many smells (lemon, vick's vaporub, freshly mopped floors, cows, just-bathed niños) and when the power comes back on in the morning and i feel the air from my fan and when people kill the tarantulas i can't bring myself to kill, when i finally get up the courage to kill a tarantula that i'm obligated to kill, when there's a night that i don't see a tarantula...

there are a lot of good things. just wanted to share. we'll see what today brings!