boys

A little over a week ago I find myself in a little church on the property of the Jaibón orphanage, worshipping and praying with all the boys. We listen to the animated Pastor give his message and everyone is given the opportunity to lead a song. A lot of the boys get up and sing, I go up with Imanol and we sing a song he taught me over a year ago, and José leads two songs on his very own guitar, one of the songs the same one I played for the boys last summer…what seems like an eternity ago, what seems like yesterday. I’m singing along with tears in my eyes looking up at this special boy that is becoming a man who I know God has set apart for great things.

At one point we are all in a circle holding hands, singing and praying, and I have never felt the Spirit move like I feel it wash over me in this moment. In this moment I know that God’s hand is on that place, on each of those boys, and that He is raising up a generation of men who seek His face; who are Kingdom-minded spiritual leaders; who bring change and carry the name of Jesus; who bring Light to dark places.

As I’m praying for each of them I look around the room and see them talking to the Lord…I squeeze Imanol’s hand and I see Chispa’s smile and I know that there are big plans being orchestrated by God and that His love is taking root in this soil of their adolescence. These are the same kids who stole my heart and made coming back to the DR not an option but an obligation. I would be here even if it were only for them.

One of my main goals in coming to the Dominican was to invest in and disciple women. While my heart still beats to see women here empowered and shown their worth, I can’t help but see the Lord beginning a movement here with men who will change this country. Once again He does “immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine”.

I truly believe that the Lord is about pulling people out of the dust and into His glory and I have complete confidence that He is moving in so many lives here. Poco a poco His glory is revealed. Amen to that.

got your update right here

hey world...

Needless to say, it's been a while. It has now been over a month since I got here, and already I see the movement of the Lord in so many parts of life here. Even just in myself. God is renewing me and causing so much of my brokenness to surface so that He can change me. Living in community with these two girls is the biggest blessing and it's causing all of us to grow in ways that are hard but good for us. I can tell that God is drawing us into glory and closer to His heart. He is shaping our vision for this place. It makes me so excited to think and dream about what this year could hold, and to know that the Lord has so much to reveal to us if we commit our plans to Him. Knowing, of course, that it won't be easy... but worth it.

I've been able to visit both orphanages multiple times and my heart has been reminded of one of the biggest reasons I came back here: those kids. They have so much of my heart, whether they know it or not, and I can't wait to see how God shapes their lives. This is Heather and I with our two little hijos in Jaibon, Luis Alberto & Jonel.


My students at school also just make my whole life. They are hilarious, sincere, and forgiving when my Spanish isn't great or my classes don't run as smoothly as I would like them to. They are excited about learning English and every day I teach them I'm blown away by how smart they are. Here are some of my second graders...


I'm excited to be able to share more now that we have internet at the house. It is good to know that so many people are praying for hope to spread its way into hearts here. I can't thank people enough for that.

hasta pronto...

tanto tiempo

Hey everyone, just now getting online after almost 5 days here in Monte Cristi... the past 5 days have seemed like a month's worth, we're not even close to getting settled in, but what is settled in is my heart. After about a day and a half of, "crap this is real life", I remembered why I came: I love these people and this place. Everything else... my Spanish, teaching, living out of a suitcase for a week or so before we move, and just getting used to daily life here... is slowly coming, but definitely not there yet. I'm learning to be okay looking like an idiot sometimes, and I'm learning how to give things over to the Lord, mainly because I have to!

I'm reading The furious longing of God by Brennan Manning, and in it I read an anonymous quote that said, 'He that would learn to pray, let him go to sea.' In my situation of vulnerability, I'm finding how real the power of God is.

I'm also just incredibly thankful for my two sisters here, Heather and Christine. God is already forming beautiful community in our home here and through our friendships and I am so blessed to have that kind of support in my life here. The little apartment we live in for the moment is already filled with so much joy and laughter and prayers. The Lord provides :)

Be in prayer for my first week teaching which starts tomorrow... God is so faithful, and He's already working out his perfect plan here. Things feel right.

More illustrated and well-thought-out updates to come!

Dios les bendiga

ciudad de luz :: city of light

Just before Jesus raised Lazarus from the dead, Martha (Lazarus' sister) was skeptical. I can imagine and almost feel and identify with her negativity and anxiety when Jesus told them to "take away the stone" from the tomb. (John 11)

But in response, Jesus said to her, "Did I not tell you that if you believed you would see the glory of God?"

If there's one thing I've learned in the past month or so, it's that when God provides, He explodes expectations. So it has been with this whole journey to the DR. We have tons of ideas for ways to serve and love the community in Monte Cristi, but our main plan was to follow the Lord's leading to specific people and ways to serve.

Well, last week Heather and I were both offered positions to teach at Ciudad de Luz, the Christian school in Monte Cristi where Christine now teaches 1st grade. Both of us, feeling that this was completely the Lord providing for us, accepted the positions! Heather will be teaching kindergarten and I will be teaching English to the elementary students. We are seriously just in awe of how many needs this meets for us and the community. Here is a pic of part of the school:


The honest truth is though, that in all the excitement of this new job, the thought of being a teacher makes me a liiiittle nervous... will I be good enough? Do I have what it takes? It's a challenge for sure. A challenge that I am both excited and nervous about. But in thinking about being out of my comfort zone, I realize that even that is a gift from God. It leaves more room for Him to be glorified. There is no way I can do this on my own steam...it'll take trust and letting go, and once again that is a good situation to find myself in... dependence.

*breathe*

So, in less than a month, I'll be a real teacher. in the Dominican Republic. How is that for unexpected? My expectations now are that God will always surpass them, whatever they are.

because, didn't He tell me...?

let me fill you in.

to update everyone on what's going on:

if you haven't noticed, we got our t-shirts and we're real excited about it. they arrived on Heather's doorstep in a big box and they are ready to be ordered and shipped :) click the "t-shirts" page at the top of this site to read about them and order one for your very own.


God is providing for us like crazy. He thinks of everything. i am amazed at how this is all unfolding and happening in perfect time. this is what it feels like to put it in the Lord's hands. i never knew! now i feel like it's the only way to live.

i spent last week in Kentucky with my family and my sweet Mammaw, dealing with the death of my D-daddy (when i learned to speak i couldn't say "grand-daddy"). he was very special and it was very hard, and it still is very hard. the past week drew my family closer together and grew me a little as a person. i saw a lot of ways the Lord redeems even the hardest losses...i was deeply encouraged by people i had never met but felt like i had known forever. i saw what true friendship is. i cried and i let go. life is a lot of letting go, in a lot of different ways. this was just one of them. be praying for my family, especially my Mammaw, Pearl.

there's a lot more to come! thanks for checking up on me every now and then. it means the world.

my best,
em

tilled & sown

Since my last post, I have booked my flight to the DR, we have ordered t-shirts, and I have traveled to Knoxville and back, where I was blessed to have spent time with a lot of different people who are important to me. Support is starting to come in, things are good.

But I will tell you that God is still wrecking me every single day.

As I pursue Him, I'm noticing how hard He is actually pursuing me... showing me areas where I need to grow, things I need to let go of so that I can be complete and whole. Every day is a kick in the pants, but still I've never felt alive like this.

Maybe you don't know this, but I constantly write. Especially now, while my days are less structured, I try to capture thoughts on paper as much as I can. It helps me process and learn. It helps me keep track of what the Lord is teaching me. So my life is more or less chronicled in notebooks and random slips of paper. I also make lists. Lists keep me going. And the anticipation of moving to the DR has resulted in more of them than I can keep up with.

Anyway, all this to say that in my writing and list-making I notice a pattern. It's happening slow, God is refining me. Little by little I am required to let go of everything I'm holding on to that's not the Father. And letting go is the hardest thing ever. I feel like this whole missions thing is fooling everyone into thinking I'm brave, when most of the time I don't feel very brave. And because of that, I'm putting myself in a position in which the Lord has to move for it to work... complete dependency on Him is where I want to be. I've heard it's a good situation to be in. And I'm still only learning, it's something I have to struggle with to grow into.

So I write, and I list. And I listen for the voice of the Lord. This might be weird, but I feel like the land of Israel that God spoke to in Ezekiel saying, "For behold, I am for you, and I will turn to you, and you shall be tilled and sown" (36:9). Even now He is preparing me for things I can't imagine... He's freeing me so I can really live, and really love and bring life to people. That's pretty cool.

He's breathing more life into me every day.

you know you want to rock this...

Would anyone be into buying a t-shirt such as this one to help support us in the DR?

If so, comment below or email me so we can get an idea of how many to order! We are looking at ordering from Alta Gracia, an ethical clothing factory in the DR that provides a living wage for Dominicans. This would be a unique opportunity to support the Dominican people in several ways at once. Thanks for your help!!

really, thanks :)

ruminate grace

ru·mi·nate [roo-muh-neyt] : to chew over and over; to meditate on; ponder.

I've recently discovered the power of ruminating. Heather pointed out this word a while back and ever since it has been very much a part of our daily vocabulary. Ruminating can be a great thing... it can also be a very unhealthy thing.

A lot of us have a tendency to chew on the same worries and fears for a long time. We keep playing them over and over in our minds until we see them as reality. This is what keeps us from moving forward in life. Truth gets muddied with our fears, the words and opinions of others, and our own desires until we can no longer see it clearly.

our feelings, our thoughts, are not always true.

But something that is literally changing my life is this: when I feel overwhelmed, or when I can't decipher what is the truth...the best thing I can do is ruminate God's word...His promises to me, what He says about me. Because that is truth. It is also good for me to think about God's grace, what He's done for me. And not just His all-encompassing grace, but the grace He shows me in the tiniest ways, every moment, every day.

Today I'm choosing to think about how His power is perfected in my weakness. His grace is sufficient for me (2 Corinthians 12:8). I honestly sometimes feel crazy, like I'm trying to do the impossible. And well maybe I am. And maybe that's when we see God's power at work.

There will always be trials and we might not always know what's best but I will search for truth, and hold on to the truth I find.

<3 em

news, news, NEWS.

this is a season of change

I graduated college in May, and May was so different from what June held and June was so different from the July that has just ended. August and into fall holds new adventure and all the fullness of God if I can just reach out and take it.


there are some things about life that I've been learning:

I want to tell everyone something. Every day I become less content with who I am, with where I am, with what I'm doing. If we are not searching for the "more" God has for us, then where are we going? really. My soul aches to be moved to deeper places. And I'm only interested in things that are real, gritty, alive and moving. What's the use in hiding or running away from what truly makes our heart beat? "Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free." (john 8:32)

And I found out that I belong in the moment. After all, that is where we find God...it's where we see grace: in the smallness of life. For the first time, the word "freedom" is starting to mean something to me. Until now I never understood that I was free to go and do and dream and laugh and dance and love, without shame. Shame does not have power over me. I want my life to be so full that there is no more room for doubt, or fear.

so, i'm going.
I go to be a part of the lives of the people who stole my heart over a year ago.
I'm going to be a vessel of this freedom.

I leave for the Dominican Republic in September (yes, 2011) to live all of this out and be with those people, loving them...Christ through me. Heather, Christine and I will be living in Monte Cristi, serving the community and seeking the Lord to learn how to disciple, invest, and bring change. Please pray that these hearts that we serve will be opened to the love of God.

***If you would like to know more about what I'll be doing and/or how you can support me, send me an email (emilee.cook@gmail.com)! I would love to send you more info than you probably even want.
There is also a link to directly support me on this page, to your right :)


more to come...

all i know.

It is now, around the start of my last semester of college, when I constantly get the question, "So, what are your plans after you graduate?" These are the words I dread, probably not unlike most people my age.

It's not that I'm not excited to share my plan, it's just that I haven't filled in all the details yet. Some very important details. I spent the week before Christmas visiting most of my Dominican friends and the orphanages where I had worked over the summer. It was so good for my heart, and I was reminded of the country's desperate need for discipleship. God has given me a place, the DR, and he has given me a vision of restoration and hope for the people there, but I am still waiting on him to reveal what it's all going to look like. Being there again caused me to rethink my previous plans and realize that everything has to start from the ground up; I can't just barge into a country and do things my way. My main goal for the DR, and in life in general, is to raise up leaders... people of God who are sold out, radical followers. So even though it is scary, I am completely okay with being in this place of waiting on the Spirit's leading, simply waiting and seeking the will of God. But still so excited to see what is coming!

Being in the DR again also renewed my passion and love for Dominican people and life there in general. Here are some pictures from my trip!

Nena and I in Monte Cristi at a special service/dinner.

me with some beloved Jaibon boys, Galan and Imanol.

Jacqueline and her boys the day we went to La Caya to visit her parents.

me with Jacqueline and Heather, my hermanitas.

All I know is, God is good. He's going to use me to bring more of his beauty and more of his kingdom to earth if I trust him. And he is going to lead me, one little detail at a time :)