dry bones.

Sitting here in my bed browsing Pinterest, a cup of piping hot Jarabacoa coffee in hand, I'm starting my day from a broken place. I have neglected to blog, mostly because I have been going through a season of confusion and disappointment. The life that I have chosen is not easy, and the past few months have been a huge reminder of that. All that said, I am still alive and okay! We're still in the school loving on kids and living life with these people, and God is here, but man... this has been a rough patch. And some days all that gets me out of bed are the Lord's promises to me of redemption. He makes all things new and I still believe that. But personally and circumstantially... this is hard.

 "let me hear joy and gladness; let the bones that you have broken rejoice." psalm 51:8

My prayer has been that the Lord would somehow revive me like He brought the dry bones to life in Ezekiel. I feel chewed up and spit out; empty and broken. And I tell you this so that you can pray for me to somehow step into the more that God has for me... because there's got to be more. My heart beats for this place and what this place needs is a miracle. It needs the Holy Spirit speaking to hearts in ways that only He can. It needs things that I could never think up or imagine on my own.

I don't want to depress or cause anyone to worry. I only want, if you would, for people to pray for a breath of life to come this way.

"And you shall know that I am the Lord, when I open your graves, and raise you from your graves, O my people. And I will put my Spirit within you, and you shall live..."  Ezekiel 37:13-14

appreciate

just taking a moment today to appreciate things from these past few days and the coming weekend (before we start teaching on monday and get into a routine...)

i think today is for loving and appreciating and taking pictures and just being with people. today is for making coffee and making people smile.  i want to capture all the goodness i see. i am thankful for laughing with friends until i lose my breath. i'm thankful that now i can listen to josé play songs he wrote himself. i'm blessed when i work huge puzzles at my kitchen table with people i love and when we all clean the garage floor and spray down the front of the house together. i love juice and colmados and heart sprinkles and so many smells (lemon, vick's vaporub, freshly mopped floors, cows, just-bathed niños) and when the power comes back on in the morning and i feel the air from my fan and when people kill the tarantulas i can't bring myself to kill, when i finally get up the courage to kill a tarantula that i'm obligated to kill, when there's a night that i don't see a tarantula...

there are a lot of good things. just wanted to share. we'll see what today brings!

city-not-forsaken

Isaiah 62
" Regarding Zion, I can't keep my mouth shut, regarding Jerusalem, I can't hold my tongue,
Until her righteousness blazes down like the sun
   and her salvation flames up like a torch.
Foreign countries will see your righteousness,
   and world leaders your glory.
You'll get a brand-new name
   straight from the mouth of God.
You'll be a stunning crown in the palm of God's hand,
   a jeweled gold cup held high in the hand of your God."

The past two weeks since I got back to the Dominican have been the most life-giving, full of joy weeks that I can remember. That is not to say that everything has been peachy, neat, or tidy - but beautiful things are happening all the time. Life is still as messy as it's always been and something new is thrown my way every day. The difference is I have this peace and joy and fullness that still hasn't gone away. 

My attention is called away from myself, away from pain to things that are beautiful... like endless cups of coffee, smiles that show the inside of a person, people who have grace for you when you mess up, coming home to a lit up house after a walk home wondering if there would be power, or witnessing someone hearing truth maybe for the first time ever. I feel more than ever a passion to fight for this place, to not give up until the Lord renews and restores. I love what I'm doing and I know it's worth it, even if the world thinks I'm crazy.

I am so blessed to be doing exactly what makes my heart come alive, and I am so thankful to all of you who are donating and praying and encouraging.  The Lord is using you to bring life to this place, and to bring life to me. All in his timing. Thank you :)

He makes all things new.

"Walk out of the gates. Get going!
   Get the road ready for the people.
Build the highway. Get at it!
   Clear the debris,
   hoist high a flag, a signal to all peoples!
Yes! God has broadcast to all the world:
   "Tell daughter Zion, 'Look! Your Savior comes,
Ready to do what he said he'd do,
   prepared to complete what he promised.'"
Zion will be called new names: Holy People, God-Redeemed,
   Sought-Out, City-Not-Forsaken."

bon voyage.

 So I'm leaving for the Dominican again, August 15th! Four days from now. I am so rested and ready to be blown away by God's glory.  I can't wait to see what's waiting. Thank you for your prayers, they are so very necessary.  If you'd like to support me financially for this year, click the Paypal link on the right side of this page to donate or send me an email (emilee.cook@gmail.com) about other ways to give! Please send me your address if you'd like to receive an update letter in the mail. I love that we can all be a part of reaching the nations in some way.

Changes this year holds: new house, new neighborhood, new school, new things to teach, new kids,  new perspective.

Life sure isn't easy but the Lord is always good and always calling us to greatness. I'm gonna say this again and by now you probably won't believe it, but I really am gonna be a better blogger!! Just wait and see.

I'll leave you with this:

give a hug today.

hi friends...

        I have been back in the States for about a week now.  Emotions and culture-shock aside, it has been so good to be with my family.  For the past few days we've been in Kentucky spending some time with my sweet Mammaw.  We are leaving tomorrow and I'm going to miss her all over again.  Still trying to process and plan for the future, but I trust that God will give me enough time and peace of mind to fit everything in.  I'm excited for the fall but so thankful for this time.  I'm trying to blog better, so we'll see how that goes :)

 

Mammaw, Jenna and me... I'm blessed.

last but not last

this is my last week in the country before leaving for a much needed few months of vacation at home.   lots of emotions, thoughts, lessons learned, and hopes for the future have my head swimming pretty much 24-7 these days, but I think I will save all of that for another post :)  this week will be spent moving into a new house in the neighborhood that stole our hearts, spending time with friends who have become family, and tying up loose ends.  it will be a week of "last" things, that are really just last things for now. the last time I had such mixed emotions about leaving a place was when I left my house 8 months ago to come here.  there are so many things I am going to miss while I'm away but sooo many things I am looking forward to.  here are some pictures of what's been going on the past little bit:

 we threw a birthday party for Ariel, for which he wanted to decorate the house himself :)

I made a trip to Santo Domingo to spend some time with Dr. Peña, a doctor and pastor who my home church has been supporting for years, and his family.

 this past week I had my last day of teaching at Ciudad de Luz.  i will miss the kids so much!

this is where we are living in the coming year! we are so excited for what the Lord has waiting for us on Calle Altagracia (high grace).

we have seen so much of the Lord's favor in how this 8 months is closing out and we're just constantly reminded of how faithful he is.  he continues to do "immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine" (ephesians 3:20) and we continue to learn how to trust that he always will. 

fullness of joy

"The lines have fallen for me in pleasant places; indeed, I have a beautiful inheritance." Psalm 16:6

The love of God falls to us in so many ways, in all areas of life. It will invade the very core of us if we let it. Sometimes I'm overwhelmed with how each day is so drenched with beauty, and other times I spend my time worrying and miss out on it. For me God's love is something I'm still discovering and encountering in new ways, one day at a time.  Some days His love looks like this:

Café con leche. Hot sun beating down on bare shoulders. Salt flats and broken green glass. Reaching into my bag and finding a necklace that Ariani made me. Reading Psalm 16 and peace washing over me, peace that you can't find anywhere else. Nelson wearing a Buzz Lightyear costume to school just because.  Listening to life-giving sermons with my two sisters.  25 peso icecream in styrofoam cups.  Laughing so hard that you start to cry and almost pee your pants. Knowing in your heart that hard things are worth it. Homemade kites. Learning to ask for impossible things. Riding through the country on a motorcycle to round up cows. Conversations where you see a little bit more of someone's heart. How good it is to take a cold shower at the hottest part of the day. Rain on tin roofs. The way Chicha pours coffee. Walking up the path to Jacqueline's house. Lighting candles when the power goes out. Unexpectedly seeing a familiar face. Knowing that the Lord really must care about even the most minute details.

The twins working on some bracelets.

 

The photo we took for our moms for Mother's Day.

Some days it's going to bed smiling, knowing that God took care of all the details, and some days it's going to bed crying, trusting that He will tomorrow. He continues to show just how good and faithful and glorious He is.

"in your presence there is fullness of joy..."
Psalm 16:11

higüey

Last weekend we traveled 8 1/2 hours to Higüey to see Jose Luis, Indiana, Nena, Joanni, and Luz Maria, 5 super special kids who used to live in the orphanage here in Monte Cristi. It had been over a year since we'd seen them and it was amazing to get to spend time with them again. Here are some pictures from our trip:

<3

small changes

A friend brought us down the book "Kisses from Katie" by Katie Davis, which was the most perfect gift for us and everyone should probably read it, and I haven't even gotten past the forward and already I feel like God is helping me define what's on my heart. This section is one hundred percent my heart for living here in the Dominican, and I wanted to share it with you.

------------

"People who really want to make a difference in the world usually do it, in one way or another. And I've noticed something about people who make a difference in the world: They hold the unshakable conviction that individuals are extremely important, that every life matters. They get excited over one smile. They are willing to feed one stomach, educate one mind, and treat one wound. They aren't determined to revolutionize the world all at once; they're satisfied with small changes. Over time, though, the small changes add up. Sometimes they even transform cities and nations, and yes, the world.

People who want to make a difference get frustrated along the way. But if they have a particularly stressful day, they don't quit. They keep going. Given their accomplishments, most of them are shockingly normal and the way they spend each day can be quite mundane. They don't teach grand lessons that suddenly enlighten entire communities; they teach small lessons that can bring incremental improvement to one man or woman, boy or girl. They don't do anything to call attention to themselves, they simply pay attention to the everyday needs of others, even if it's only one person. They bring change in ways most people will never read about or applaud. And because of the way these world-changers are wired, they wouldn't think of living their lives any other way."

-Beth Clark, Forward of "Kisses from Katie" by Katie Davis

live in the sunshine, swim the sea, drink the wild air

blogging is a hard deal because every time i sit down to write, my head swims with all thoughts and people and stories i want to share. life here is beautiful and full of God's grace and for those reasons and more it is a life that is difficult to narrow down. nonetheless, blogging is something i want to get better at :)

never in life have i welcomed a new year as i do this one. with everything i want to be doing here - whether it be school, hanging out in orphanages, or just living life with people - the days begin to get packed, the nights become short, my eyelids grow heavy. i needed a fresh start. i needed to refocus.

over this past break the Lord has taken me under His wing and given me a new perspective, washing me clean of my selfishness, reminding me i don't have to do everything myself, showing me more glimpses of His plan, healing me. i have forgotten how to make time for the things that bring me joy...like writing, blogging, running, being outside, the beach, music, talking to my family and friends - the list is long. i live in the most beautiful place ever and i feel like i haven't been taking enough advantage of that. the Lord is teaching me again how to walk in the freedom He's given me, the same freedom He sent me to bring to people here.

i feel like the most clever thing the enemy can do is to bog down my mind. to overwhelm me. but i am thankful that the Holy Spirit wants to constantly renew my mind, so that i'm able to see more clearly the heart of God (Romans 12:2). and that is my prayer every day from here on out that my mind is transformed and renewed until my life is not even a bit my own anymore.

i just need to remember i'm free. i forget sometimes.

"live in the sunshine, swim the sea, drink the wild air" -ralph waldo emerson

this is where i live.

*side note: there is a lot of good going on here, and i would love to share some of it with whoever is interested in praying over specific people and situations that i would rather not post publicly. for this reason i am going to start regularly emailing updates and requests for prayer. if you would like to be on the list of people to receive those emails, please send a note to emilee.cook@gmail.com letting me know. i am excited to share and feel more connected through prayer :)